Author Topic: Lets start with a smile  (Read 555347 times)

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2265 on: October 18, 2018, 03:18 PM »
Autumn   leaves...............................then  winter  arrives...

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2266 on: October 18, 2018, 09:12 PM »
there is a website called  Bigbustycoons.com and these  guys  realy know how to run a bus company..

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2267 on: October 19, 2018, 10:41 PM »
if it rains  pennies  from heaven........................... its  just  climate   change 

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2268 on: October 20, 2018, 01:26 AM »
man, i want to divorce my wife, lawyer. "on what grounds"? man " she is out all night going from pub  to pub every night"lawyer "do you think she is an alcoholic or cheating onyou?" man "no she is looking for me"

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2269 on: October 21, 2018, 01:00 AM »
a veterinarian goes to the doctor complaining of pains he keeps getting the doctor asks him "how often and how long do these pains  last? he replied snarky "look doctor i don"t have the privilege of asking  my animals questions " so the doctor said OK and started an exam where the vet had the pain  after a minute or so the doctor stood up and wrote  a prescription out  and replied " take these pills and if you are not better in a few days  we  will have to put you down" 

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2270 on: October 21, 2018, 03:36 AM »
a  man said his wife was going to leave him because of a spelling mistake he said he was on a works  trip and he text  his wife " having a wonderful time wish you were her"

Kiwi

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2271 on: October 23, 2018, 01:28 AM »
We lost all the vowels from our Scrabble set. So I sold it on Ebay as a Welsh edition.
"We don't want blood all over the lawn and the hounds are fagged out from yesterdays Jehovah's witnesses"

Kiwi

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2272 on: October 23, 2018, 01:30 AM »
Two Irish hunters get a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. They bag six.

As Paddy and Mick start loading the plane for the return trip, the Pilot says "The plane can only take four of those."

The two lads object strongly. "Last year we shot six, and the pilot let us put them all on board, he had the same plane as yours."

Reluctantly, the pilot gives in and all six are loaded. However, even with full power, the little plane can't handle the load and down it goes and crashes in the middle of nowhere. A few moments later, climbing out of the wreckage, Paddy asks Mick, "Any idea where we are?"

"I think we're pretty close to where we crashed last year." Says Mick.
"We don't want blood all over the lawn and the hounds are fagged out from yesterdays Jehovah's witnesses"

Kiwi

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2273 on: October 23, 2018, 01:32 AM »
Whoever stole my anti-depressants..........I hope you're happy now.
"We don't want blood all over the lawn and the hounds are fagged out from yesterdays Jehovah's witnesses"

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2274 on: October 23, 2018, 04:19 PM »
a man went in the drug store  and asked for some thing for persistent  wind so they  sols  him a kite

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2275 on: October 23, 2018, 04:33 PM »
who ever wins the mega millions  jackpot  will make  history they will be the first  billionaire to pay  taxes

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2276 on: October 24, 2018, 04:28 PM »
 a Chinese  company  have made a sex toy  vending  machine  so they thought they should honor  the man who invented  it by putting his name on all the machines ........Dick  D   Spencer         

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2277 on: October 25, 2018, 09:43 PM »
a man said " i was watching Jurassic park the other day and i thought  not only does my son have a stupid  name he is also a lousy  driver.".

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2278 on: October 26, 2018, 02:55 AM »
if you watch a movie starring  Jackie  Chan backwards  you will see a documentary of a Chinese man assembling furniture by his  feet 

KENNETHO

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Re: Lets start with a smile
« Reply #2279 on: October 30, 2018, 07:57 PM »
if a midget  smokes  pot  does he get high or medium???