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Messages - brian seward

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Smile, please! / Re: Lets start with a smile
« on: April 25, 2015, 09:34 PM »
Was in the Drug store and noticed a new "Stick deodorant" I took it home and read the instructions ,
"Remove cap and push up the bottom"  Well I'm kinda walking funny but when I pass wind the room smells lovely !

Smile, please! / Re: Lets start with a smile
« on: February 24, 2015, 01:26 AM »
Mother in Law arrives home from shop to find her son in law Paddy in a steaming rage hurriedly packing his suitcase, What happened Paddy she asked anxiously?  What Happened? I'll tell you what happened. I sent her an e Mail telling her I was coming home from my fishing trip. I get home and guess what, I find your daughter Jean, my wife naked in bed with   Joe Murphy. This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage ,I'm done, leaving home..
Now calm down Paddy says Mother in Law, there's something odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing, there must be an explanation, I'll go and speak with her and find out what  happened.
Moments later Mother in Law comes back with a big smile,  Paddy, I told you there was a simple explanation..

   "She never got your e Mail " ::)

Smile, please! / Re: Lets start with a smile
« on: February 24, 2015, 12:52 AM »
We had a power outage at our house this morning and my PC, laptop,
cordless phone, and my new surround sound system shut down.
Then I discovered that my iPad and iPhone batteries  were flat, and to top it off it was raining outside so I couldn't play golf.
I went to the kitchen to make a coffee, then remembered that also needs power, So I sat down and talked to my wife for a while.
                     She seems like a nice person.

Memory Lane / Re: Memory
« on: February 08, 2015, 04:58 AM »
Geoff,  No Relation the Walmsley's who lived on  Pottinger St ????

Talking about Ashton / Re: Ashton Pictures
« on: December 08, 2014, 05:05 AM »
I have just spent a long half hour going through this thread. while doing so I remember going to the "Joan Hall School  of Dancing" (in the thirties) and it was on Stamford St second floor above a pub?.. Anyone else went there??/ :)

Technical Matters / Re: Euro mark
« on: November 25, 2014, 01:14 AM »
Thank you Martin, You really are a "Hero" Member. I must have tried a dozen combinations!!!.

Technical Matters / Euro mark
« on: November 23, 2014, 11:04 PM »
  We N Americans do not have Pounds or Euros  on our keyboard. So some time ago I found out that to get    you press Alt and 156 on numerical board  Is there a  way to get Euro???

Memory Lane / Re: PUBS IN ASHTON
« on: July 30, 2014, 10:37 PM »
Ken,  New Inn corner of Princess St and Mossley Rd.  Opposite is the Cottage Tavern and a few yards up is the miner's at the corner of Montague Rd.
Iv'e had a few gallons in all of them, Mind you, that was when Beer was less than shilling a pint!!.
How much is it now? here in Western Canada it is $5 in our local Canadian Legion. Scotch  Gin, Vodka   is $6 and up!.

Memory Lane / Re: PUBS IN ASHTON
« on: July 29, 2014, 05:32 AM »
Reading about all the pubs closings reminds me to cheer the Mossley Rd Trio The New Inn, Cottage Tavern and the Miner's, Long may they reign. What say you "Jayess"?

Smile, please! / bedtime chat
« on: May 16, 2014, 05:24 AM »
Joe and Mary were lying in bed, chatting when Mary said Joe, If I passed away would you get married again?
Joe;I doubt it
Mary; So you dont like marriage
Joe;Oh yes, Yes I might remarry
Mary;  Would you sleep in our bed
Joe; Sure nothing wrong with this bed
Mary;  Would you give her my clothes
Joe; No I think she would buy her own
Mary. How about my jewellery?
Joe; She might like some of it.
Mary; How about my golf clubs?
Joe, No, she's left handed
Mary; Silence
Joe; S**T!

Smile, please! / Text Joke?
« on: May 15, 2014, 07:17 PM »
Paddy texts his wife "Mary, I am having a few drinks with the lads in the pub, If I am not home in twenty minutes read this message again.

Memory Lane / Re: PUBS IN ASHTON
« on: May 12, 2014, 04:07 AM »
Thanks Herb, In that period the owner was Hilda Neild . Maybe Bryan's dad was the Manager, By the way, today, Sunday is Mothers Day  over here .. So happy Mom's day to all viewers

Memory Lane / Re: PUBS IN ASHTON
« on: May 07, 2014, 05:45 AM »
Talking about the pubs on Scotland St, brought to mind that I went to school with a boy named Bryan Downing who lived in one of the Pubs down there .  Cannot recall which it was as I was about 12/13 at the time (app,1939), and I do not see the name of a Publican of that name in the good book!..

Memory Lane / Re: Heartbeat
« on: May 05, 2014, 06:27 PM »
Last night  watched Harriet Walters in Waking the Dead She has been in a lot of shows appearing on our networks. But never Heartbeat ?.

General Discussion / Re: Another Star bites the dust
« on: May 04, 2014, 07:57 PM »
RIP Efrem Zimbalist Jnr, Died today in Hollywood Ca,  I actually was introduced to him once when I went down to see the Dinah Shore Ladies Golf tournament in Palm Springs the early 90s

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